My wife hates that she “always has to pick the restaurant,” when we go out. I cant make her realize she shot down my first 3 suggestions before asking what she wanted. Yes you pick because everything i suggest you dont want tonight and ill eat everything.
She can’t figure out what she wants and wants you to solve it, exactly. She has to pick because she wants to want the answers you give but she doesn’t. What’s it like for you to have to go through this repeatedly, does she know or care?
Ive gotten over itnas best i can. The worst is when i cook something, and she decides thats not what she wants, so she cooks something else for herself.
But she also gets upset that she does most of the cooking. Like yeah no shit. I dont need praise from you for everything i do, but less negative reinforcement would go a long way.
Therapy is helping though. I can hear it in the way she talks to our kids about life and how to treat others. So the realization is coming through
depression can very much make you become bored by things you used to like, its called anhedonia and it doesnt always go away even after some pretty intensive treatments, or even if the depression itself is managed.
Should have asked what she wanted to do instead
She wants you to know what she wants so she doesn’t have to do the work figuring it out, because she wants to be a child again.
My wife hates that she “always has to pick the restaurant,” when we go out. I cant make her realize she shot down my first 3 suggestions before asking what she wanted. Yes you pick because everything i suggest you dont want tonight and ill eat everything.
She can’t figure out what she wants and wants you to solve it, exactly. She has to pick because she wants to want the answers you give but she doesn’t. What’s it like for you to have to go through this repeatedly, does she know or care?
Ive gotten over itnas best i can. The worst is when i cook something, and she decides thats not what she wants, so she cooks something else for herself.
But she also gets upset that she does most of the cooking. Like yeah no shit. I dont need praise from you for everything i do, but less negative reinforcement would go a long way.
Therapy is helping though. I can hear it in the way she talks to our kids about life and how to treat others. So the realization is coming through
“Whatever you want to do.”
“I have a headache.”
“I’m fine!”
Try having more money and those excuses vanish
So you’re saying that … a woman’s partner having more money … makes them… decisive?
Like, inherently?
… or because women only want to do things that cost a significant amount of money, and give noncommital answers when such money is not present?
I am genuienly trying to follow the logic here.
It has nothing to do with money. This is something people will struggle with sans agriculture and in a perfect gift economy utopia.
Only boring people are bored (and depression is not boredom).
depression can very much make you become bored by things you used to like, its called anhedonia and it doesnt always go away even after some pretty intensive treatments, or even if the depression itself is managed.
The lack of want is horrible to live with.
Yeah, that’s totally how it works.
It is in a healthy relationship.
Maybe they should have expanded on their ‘nah’ then
Happy wife, happy life.