I think root comment is simply saying that they didn’t want to “bother” women.
But reality is that when initiating any kind of social contact, you have to risk being a “bother”. Over time you learn to judge the risk better, but there’s always a risk. If you want to form relationships you just have to take the chance and go ahead anyways. Even if you’re afraid of being a creep, or being annoying, or bothering them. You have to use your best judgement and initiate when you feel it’s ok.
I’m not 18 anymore. All, and I mean all friends and friends of friends are either married, longterm or with children. Do you know what it’s like to be the only one with any realationships past your 30s? Not just “single”, “no relationships”. People look at you differently, people talk to you differently, people treat you differently. Especially your inner circle of friends where something like that is common knowledge. At least with strangers you can play on the novelty of the conversation and pretend your life isn’t in shambles before they start to catch on.
Besides depression already did it’s thing and I haven’t had contact with any of my friends for over a year. So I guess its safe to say, no more birthday invites for me…
Doesn’t really follow from
There’s a lot of spaces between “don’t hit on the waitress” and “chat with friends of friends at a birthday party”
Of course, you do have to enter the world to be perceived by the world.
I think root comment is simply saying that they didn’t want to “bother” women.
But reality is that when initiating any kind of social contact, you have to risk being a “bother”. Over time you learn to judge the risk better, but there’s always a risk. If you want to form relationships you just have to take the chance and go ahead anyways. Even if you’re afraid of being a creep, or being annoying, or bothering them. You have to use your best judgement and initiate when you feel it’s ok.
I’m not 18 anymore. All, and I mean all friends and friends of friends are either married, longterm or with children. Do you know what it’s like to be the only one with any realationships past your 30s? Not just “single”, “no relationships”. People look at you differently, people talk to you differently, people treat you differently. Especially your inner circle of friends where something like that is common knowledge. At least with strangers you can play on the novelty of the conversation and pretend your life isn’t in shambles before they start to catch on.
Besides depression already did it’s thing and I haven’t had contact with any of my friends for over a year. So I guess its safe to say, no more birthday invites for me…