Nope I don’t think any of those things. I’m just sad that there was nobody in my life to teach be that you shouldn’t base your happiness on the expectations you put on others.
I wish I would have realised that before reaching an age where it would be embarrassing to try to become a functioning person.
Or, I can do nothing, stay “barely passing”, continue to mask the rest and deal with the mental consequences of that on my own time. The silver lining is that fortunately life and it’s bullshit are finite.
Grown comfortable? Please… I have my 10.000 hours in, I am a master. Any effort for improvement has to compete with the effortless act of doing something by instinct.
There’s no point in becoming a better person for me. For whom even? I could be the nicest, smartest, most capable, most empathetic, most charismatic version of myself I’d still be blindly stepping around in a dark forest alone.
All my life I’ve missed every off-ramp, every warning sign, every speed bump, I flew through the dirt after the road has ended and now I am stuck in a ditch.
I’m somebody who need to be thrown into the water to learn how to swim instead I’ve been told not to step in it because there might be sharks.
Nope I don’t think any of those things. I’m just sad that there was nobody in my life to teach be that you shouldn’t base your happiness on the expectations you put on others.
I wish I would have realised that before reaching an age where it would be embarrassing to try to become a functioning person.
About learning to be a better person: you can either start now, or think about it for a couple of more years. I think, better start now!
Or, I can do nothing, stay “barely passing”, continue to mask the rest and deal with the mental consequences of that on my own time. The silver lining is that fortunately life and it’s bullshit are finite.
I get that change is hard, but masking and dealing with the mental consequences isn’t easy, either. It’s just what you’ve grown comfortable with.
Grown comfortable? Please… I have my 10.000 hours in, I am a master. Any effort for improvement has to compete with the effortless act of doing something by instinct.
There’s no point in becoming a better person for me. For whom even? I could be the nicest, smartest, most capable, most empathetic, most charismatic version of myself I’d still be blindly stepping around in a dark forest alone.
All my life I’ve missed every off-ramp, every warning sign, every speed bump, I flew through the dirt after the road has ended and now I am stuck in a ditch.
I’m somebody who need to be thrown into the water to learn how to swim instead I’ve been told not to step in it because there might be sharks.
But enough with the metaphors for now.
You could be satisfied with who you are, which has nothing to do with material conditions.
More like contempt rather than satisfied.