Every time I go on a date in the movies, I get the popcorn and cut a hole in the bottom so my penis can be in there for them to find as a surprise. This was especially exciting during those years when I was a woman.
Umm wtf?
Must restrain self… eats half the popcorn… god that’s salty AF but so good… Drinks 1/2 gallon of soda…
breaks the seal before the movie starts, followed by one trip half way through and my right leg tapping during the climax and busting out to the bathroom 10 sec into the credits.
Eat before watching the movie, eat after watching the movie.
If you still crave popcorn then buy after the interval cause climax will be the best place to not have snoring stomach.
Before The Movie 2
Return of the ads
I love our little local indie cinema. Super comfy recliners, they don’t deliver your food until after it starts. And the food is fucking soooo good. We got huge (gotta be over 2 lbs) of nachos with chicken, pico, cheese, avocado, for $14. Between the two of us we couldn’t finish it.
IMAX is a fucking scam. I want a 30% refund for every IMAX ticket I’ve ever bought.
Movies over 2h gotta have a halftime to go pee and buy more popcorn
Me paying a premium to watch a movie in a cinema: Still have to watch 30min of ads, expensive drinks and snacks, have annoying subs in my language, no leg space.
Me downloading a movie and watch it on my beamer: No ads, pause whenever I want, cheap drinks and snacks, nice English subs, comfortable couch with endless leg space, no one complaining when I take a bump of cocain to counter the alcohol.
Yeah but unlike the cinema, at home there’s no random old dude trying to give you a handjob whether you want one or not.
I don’t think we’re talking about the same kind of theater
I’ve never had that happen to me. Where can I find the cinema where this old dude goes to, and what kind of movies does he like? Asking for a friend.
Its OK though, youll have a whole cinema performance to distract you from your popcornless existence.
The popcorn exists solely to get you through the adverts.
Introducing snacks into theaters was a dipshit idea.
What are you all doing watching ads in cinema xD
Either I am 20 minutes late or I don’t come. I refuse to be on time - I am here for a movie, not ad stream xD
if i pay for a fucking cinema ticket why is it normalized that they air 20 minutes of ADS, i PAID for the movie fuck off
Why not go a little later?
I went in like 15min late, there was no-one to inspect my ticket so it felt criminal to let myself in but I went in regardless and had a good time, saw only two ads though
Yeah, I always show up when the movie actually starts. I know that AMC lists the actual start time along with the showing time. This usually happens on accident anyway, my friends are always late to show up to carpool anyways
With my luck, specifically that screening will be ad-free and I’ll miss a lot.
I could swear there was a short time when the movie actually started at the time specified and they just played the ads earlier.
That’s how I remember it growing up
Not OP, but I used to always have to show up early so I could get good seats — why do the rows just feet from the screen even exist — but I guess now that selecting seats when you buy your ticket online is normalized, it isn’t usually necessary. Hadn’t considered before, though tbf I rarely go to the theater.
Cause suckers like you keep coming back. It is just that simple.
Because it takes at least HALF A FUCKING HOUR FROM START TIME TO THE ACTUAL MOVIE
Yeah, you eat all the snacks during the previews so you don’t make excessive noise and disturb others during the actual film
How i wish people would do that. Last 2 movies I went to was one hour of extremely loud munching noises.
Potato Chips and Corn Nuts are fantastic snacks everyone should eat during the movie…
Especially if you wash them down with a nearly empty drink using a straw.
I’ll see my way out.
Shake the ice around to make more liquid. Just give it a real good swirl. Then stab at the ice with the straw so it makes that horny goose noise.
Yeah…I miss when I had a full home theatre in my basement for that exact reason. I basically only go now if I can splurge for the VIP seats or I know it’s gonna be an empty theatre. So basically never.
Then you spend the rest of the movie with greasy, gritty fingers, an odd taste in your mouth, and a wayward kernel stuck between your teeth.
No thanks; I keep my popcorn eating to home movie watching, where I can pause to wash my hands, refill the snack tray, and floss my teeth if needed.
wayward kernel stuck between your teeth
If it at least were a Linux kernel.
You don’t bring floss to the theater?
Or wet wipes?
Wet wipes are hell, for some reason they leave my hand sticky with something even if they were clean before what the fuck do they put in them??
Mostly a proprietary blend of hydrogen and oxygen.
Lmaoo
